Bihar Calls

We recently visited Didi in Delhi. That was quite a bit of culture change for Venky. For one, eveybody could understand what he speaks (his prime language of communication is Hindi). Plus a whole bunch of cousin sisters doted on him and gave him so much of attention. Venky was totally loving it. Till his sisters decided to take him to the apartment's park.

Venky found a slide and captured it. After a few minutes of play on the slide, he had company. Another kid who was twice his size and age and twice as fast joined him. Even before Venky could complete one trip, he finished two trips for the slide. Venky's ego was hurt and he decided that he could definately not let him do a 3rd round before him.

So, he pushed him (before we could react) and said "Mujhe jana hai!". The kid's nanny held him back and let Venky complete his round. But now, Venky was not ready to relent at all. He just wouldn't let that kid use the slide and was constantly trying to push him. After a while, the older kid stopped pretending to be mature and pushed him back.

That was quite a fall, and we thought that Venky will be wailing. But even before we picked him up, Venky was on his feet and pushed the older kid again. All this, without a frown on his face. Now, all the elders intervened and separated the kids. The older kid's nanny took him to another swing which he got interested into and we took Venky to the nearby temple.

Well, Vibhu was proud of his son's bravery (the fact that he took on an older kid and wasn't scared of him) and couldn't help hiding his joy. He was thrilled at the fact that his son was a true blue "Bihari" and not a "Murgi". I have to confess that I was grinning too :D

The Pampered Parent

Yesterday, as we were preparing for bed, I slipped and fell. I had a laptop in one hand. So, intinctively I tried to save it, so I landed flat on my back. While I was gathering my senses, Vibhu shouted and asked if I was alright. Venky, who was playing nearby, also ran to me. I lay still for sometime to figure out if I was hurt and decided that everything was ok.

By the time I sat up, Venky had pulled a long face and was about to cry. He immideately pulled me into a tight hug. He looked very upset and on the verge of tears. I had to reassure him for a long time that I was fine. He just clung to me all the while.

Later in the bed, Venky put the pillow on his lap and asked me to sleep there. He then stroked my hair and cheeks as if patting me to sleep. He had noticed Vibhu checking my back to see if I was bruised. Venky checked my back too as asked "yahan pe chot laga (are you hurt here) ?". When I said "yes", he rubbed it and blew on it. Then he insisted on giving me gripe water and made me have some :D

Needless to say, I was enjoying all the attention. I have to confess that I pretended to be more hurt and bruised than I was (actually I was not hurt at all). After giving me the gripe water, Venky asked "theek ho gaya (is it alright now)?". I answered in affirmative but I guess Venky was not too convinced. To pep me up he said "Tum sundar ladki ho (you are beautiful), I love you." Whoever taught him that!!! Venky is still 1 month away from being 2 and most of the kids are not even able to frame sentences by this age. Such lovely sentences coming from him! I was ecstatic.

Venky followed it up by telling me the stories that I tell him in broken sentences. In fact I fell asleep before he did. Yesterday, I was a thoroughly pampered parent. I wouldn't mind a few such falls every now and then! :-)

Lessons in Love

This incident happened almost a month ago. It keeps coming back to me and I think I'll always remember it. Nevertheless, I still want to jot it down.

At 11 pm , we are the most sleepy and Venky is the most playful. Probably because that is his most exclusive time with us and we are shower him with all our attention to get him to sleep. After playing, reading and cajoling him, I often have to put on my "strict parent" demeanor to put him to sleep.

That day was no different. Venky was in an extra playful mood and did not take my strictness to well. He threw a tantrum. Venky often uses his head as a weapon, and just bangs it on when he is angry. So, there came his head right on my cheekbone.

The sharp pain made me bury my head in the pillows. It actually took me a while to gather my senses. I could hear Venky beside me saying "mommy chot" (meaning mommy is hurt). Venky was able to realize that he had caused the damage and was trying to lift my head from the pillow.

I was too hurt and angry for his cuteness to pacify me and I pushed him back asking him to get lost. Now, Venky was howling with tears in full flow. Vibhu tried to console him but he would not stay with him. He kept coming back to me saying "mommy, mommy" and crying.

Vibhu urged me to pick him up and I reluctantly did that, still upset with him. That is when I noticed that there was a bump on his forehead. He was hurt too! Venky finally stopped crying in my lap and went off to sleep.

Later, when I discussed the bump with Vibhu, he told me that Venky had not bothered about his own pain at all. When both of us were hurt, Venky was only touching his forehead and trying to lift me up to see if I was alright. Later, when I pushed him away, he was crying because he thought that I was angry with him. Venky kept coming to me till I picked him up.

All this from a 20 mo old toddler. He was more concerned about my pain and anger when he was hurt himself. How does that make me feel? - Extremely guilty and humbled. As we grow up we unlearn to love others. We just start loving ourselves. How can I stop Venky from doing that? I guess first I'll have to learn from him and then teach him back.

For now, I'll just thank Venky for loving me more than I love him. Its hard to accept, but that's a fact.





This blog post is an entry for IndusLadies mother's day blog contest

Conversations with a 21 old

Venky - "mommy"
I - "Yes..."

Venky - "MOMMY"
I - "Yes Venky"

Venky - "MOMMEEE"
I - "Yes Sweetheart"

Venky - "I Lob you"

:):):)

Outsmarted by 21 mo old

Venky and I are reading a picture book.

I - "Yeh kya hai?"
Venky - "Butterfly"
I - "Yeh kya hai?"
Venky - "Dragon Fly"

Now we reach the "Beetle" page which Venky has never remembered so far

I - "Yeh kya hai?"
Venky - "Uhmmmm ....Book!" :D

The goodbyes are back

Even since the separation anxiety struck (almost an year now), Venky hated us leave for office. As he grew older it was got more difficult to distract him. For the past couple of months, he would not let us out of his sight once we left the bed. Even after his nanny managed to pacify him into some play, he would immideately know when our car unlocked. Many times, I had to leave him wailing to the office.

Over the last week I noticed, he did not seem as anxious in the mornings. He did not run behind me when I got up to leave. In fact most of the times, he would be busy in his play as I quietly slipped out.

And today, there was a miracle. Venky figured that I was leaving for office. He said - "Teen Chocote lana, Banana lana, Apple lana" (Get me 3 choclates, banana and apple). Then he waved bye! As I reversed the car, he kept waving bye and even crouched to get a better view of me as I waved back. All this, with a smile on his face!

Needless to say, I grinned all the way to office:)

Terrible Two at One and a half.

1. Vibhu comes home from office. Venky runs to him and throws himself in Vibhu's hands. And before Vibhu can realize, Venky pulls his glass and throws it on the ground (Thanks to the plastic lenses they are still surviving ater 50 such falls)

2. Venky aims all his balls at our TV screen

3. Venky always throws our cell phones such that they open up in 3 or more pieces (he has a toy cell phone which is a great imitation of the real one but never throws that)

4. Venky says - "X" Chahiye. (X is more often chocolate). I say - No. Venky falls flat on ground. Bangs his fist followed by his head. He throws everything that he can lay his hands on.

5. If I raise my voice at him by x decibel, Venky starts crying with 10x decibels and then I have to spend half an hour to pamper him back into the mood.

6. Venky picks up all the drying clothes from the clothes line and puts them into the flower bed.

7. Whenever Venky spots an open bathroom, he goes in and opens the tap. While I am closing that tap, he runs to the other bathroom and opens the tap there.

8. Venky pushes his toy bucket such that it falls and all the toys are scattered on the floor. Then he goes off to ride his bike

9. Venky pulls out bed sheets as soon as I tuck them in

10. Venky's favorite TV programme is "Air Crash Investigations" and his bed time story is "Aeroplane toot gaya - sea mein gir gaya" ( BTW, I am the one who is on the aeroplane in that story).

Phew!!! I want to excahnge. Anyone?